Today is going well... much better than the manic depressive in my head tried to convince me this morning.  I woke up at about half 9, feeling perfectly rested and awake.  But my head started questioning the need to get up.  Why bother? What is there to get up for?  I eventually emerged from my bed at 12, at which point I got angry with the manic depressive within for being such a lazy git.  My dream of cuddling a penguin may have been nicer than the reality of my life but there is just no excuse for such laziness.

When I did eventually get up I checked my emails as I always do.  Today was different from yesterday.  Yesterday my hope was dwindling.  But in all fairness it was the first day back for many after Christmas, did I really expect the job boards to be full?  Today, however, the first email I read had a job.  And not just a random junk 'graduate recruitment, earn up to £35k ote in year one' crap one.  It was a CAD technician.  A junior one at that.  On top of that I found another five jobs to apply to.  Not all of which are in my league of pay, but if I have learnt anything from my brother recently, it is to not look at the pay.  Yesterday he started a job paying £18k a year, with a company car and laptop and phone I do believe.  And he only just turned 20 and has no more than a BTEC and beat off an experienced 30 year old.  If he can do it then why can't I?  If I can do what it says in the description then why should I let the pay affect my application?  So maybe nothing will come of a few of them.  But maybe something will.  You never know if you don't try.  On top of this I discovered that one of the least motivated students in my tutor group has landed a job as an interior design tutor.  Now while I am dubious of how good this job is, he could barely do well as a student, how he will be a tutor I do not know, I am still hopeful that if he can do it then surely so can I.

Later tonight I am going round to my mothers, need her opinions on the manic depressive living in my head.  And my football team, Burnley, are taking on Spurs in the Carling Cup... we have already knocked out Chelsea and Arsenal so while I may have doubts, I am staying positive and hopeful for it!

Jobs Applied For_ 5
Tears_ 0