2009 is my year! The faeries said so. The tarot cards said so. And my horoscopes have been preparing me for a big move for some time now. Someone must have forgotten to tell these magical powers about the recession. Ripping off my calendar today I noticed the date. Now, I was aware that it was late January. But then it hit me, not only is it now the 26th, but February starts on Sunday!!! One month down and 2009 is still not looking overly positive for me. I'm trying my best, but with it being 'that time of the month' my Positive Mental Attitude is waning slightly.
With my mood dropping today, I'm starting to question if these hormones are all merely part of a self-fulfilling prophecy. If I had just ignored my pill schedule [and maybe taken Evening Primrose Oil just to be safe] would I be ok now? Has my motivation dwindled and positivity withered because I feel that it should around now? Well, its hard to know really. I'm just grateful that, so far, I'm not feeling as bad as I have done the past few months. Perhaps it is true that forewarned is forearmed? Knowing that PMT was upon me, and not feeling like I had suddenly slumped in to depression like previous months means that my mind is prepared for it, and knows that my world is not caving in on me so positive thinking can go that bit further. Fingers crossed!
With my panic that January is almost over came an intense job search. As always I found a whole load of nothing. But of course, with panic comes craziness. So I applied for a couple that I have the skills for but will probably never hear back from. With very little to apply for, I feel that I have to apply for everything I possibly can even if I truly doubt my chances. If not then I feel like I'm doing nothing to help myself and deserve this crappy situation. And I figure, if the ignorant people at the recruitment agencies never have the decency to reply to me, then I'll force them to look at applications that are a waste of time. I still havn't heard back from one the other week that I could have done with my eyes closed. I'm starting to lose hope again. But what can I do? If there are no jobs out there, there is nothing I can do. Damn recession. Damn it!!!
The step sister has been skiving off school today. Why? Because she was sick last night! Being a bit of a geek in my school days, people like this annoy me. With the exception of the one time that I fell asleep in RE, and being the teachers pet got sent to the sick room because something was obviously wrong with me [I was just tired and she had put on a dull video] I have never skived [well, there were 2 PE lessons but that really is it, I swear!]. The step sister, however, has made skiving a true skill. She only goes to school 3 days a week as it is. How she hopes to get any GCSEs I am not sure. Now, when I questioned father on why she never goes, he said she had dropped one of her subjects and was waiting to get on a new one. This was in October. She still doesn't go. When I was young, mother always told me that if I didn't go to school the police would arrest her. Some parents really do need arresting for such awful parenting skills. I thought last night was a break through. After reading the note that said she had been sick [at about 8pm] so wouldn't be well enough to go to school, she had ripped it up and thrown it in the bin. I was so hopeful that this was a turnaround. But no, at half 11 this morning the step sister saunters down stairs and sits herself in front of the TV for the day.
America's Next Top Model tonight. Woop Woop!!! The wait [a whole 4 weeks since the last season I think] is over!!!
Jobs Applied For_ 5
Tears_ 0
Worst Advert Seen_ Dairy Milk [wtf?]
Minutes of Succesful Exercise_ 45 [woop woop]
Chocolate Cravings_ Out of control!!!
