I know that designs aren't always to everyone's tastes. So I accept that in my career [when it eventually gets underway] I will have people that think what I have done is a hideous eyesore. There were people on my course that made me wonder what on earth they were doing a degree in design for because they just didn't seem to have that 'design flair'. But this is just an insult. A huge slap in the face. A few months ago I designed some leaflets for the step mothers shop. I don't like her but I was doing it for my father so I did my best and created her a classy and sophisticated leaflet. They have butchered it before but I took that as a one-off. It would seem not, as today I found a pile of these pixelated, hideous insults sitting on the table. At first, I was angry... if you don't like my work then at least tell me what you want and I will re-do it so that the images are still clear and the font is right. At the very least just ask me for the font and stop using that vile creation. The anger passed. But what better way to say goodbye to the PMT than another good cry. I would expect nothing else from the step mother, its the slap in the face from my father that hurts most. The one man in every girls life that she is meant to be able to depend on. I'm not saying I can't, I love my daddy and I can go to him for anything, and he will always be there for me but since the witch arrived on the scene about 4 years ago I feel like I've lost him to her.
But moving on from that because I need to get ready to go out so I need to think happier thoughts to stop the tears. Good job nobody was in the house earlier today when I answered the door... to the wind. Yes, it was so windy that it had moved the knocker on the front door. Not just once, it did it 3 times in quick succession making it sound like a very convincing knock. I thought maybe it was the postman so I jumped up and went to answer it. There was no-one there, but the wind was so strong that it blew a canvas off the wall. Thank goodness I was the only one in. As if to continue mocking me after it just carried on knocking every 10 minutes or so. I was tempted to answer a few times but wasn't risking the embarrassment again, if someone was there they could find the door bell.
I went to a wedding dress shop with father today. Not because I'm secretly hiding a fiancé, but to apply for a job. Not that I have suddenly become interested in the love business, just because the step mother saw an advert for it in the newspaper so I couldn't say no because it would look like I'm not looking properly. In all honesty, if the shop had been an electricals shop or pet shop I probably would have said no, I couldn't do that in a million years but since watching Jeniffer Lopez in The Wedding Planner I have had a secret desire to be a wedding planner. Perhaps selling wedding dresses can be my first step on this new career ladder. Not one to do well in job applications I won't get my hopes up but I may dream tonight of being surrounded by beautiful white dresses all day every day. After this I went to town with mother to find her some new shoes. Now either mother isn't fully up to date with fashion, she tries her best but she is limited to only a few trends at a time, or I have awful taste. I showed her a pair, her comment was "Don't you think they look a bit old grannyish?" No mother, I wouldn't show you old grannyish shoes! I thought they were quite nice for what she was looking for. Anyone else want to insult my taste and eye for design today?
The Student Loan company are nagging at me for money. They aren't having it, I don't have it. Well, really they are just wishing to know what I am up to so they can figure out if they can start raping my bank account. They supplied me a lovely envelope with the address pre-printed, but in the corner wrote "Affix stamp here". The £12 and a half grand [plus £50 interest a month] I owe isn't enough, I have to get my own stamps too. I understand that they have a lot of people to send these fancy envelopes to but to just pay the postage would be such a thoughtful and kind gesture. If the £12 and a half grand I owe isn't enough then my interest alone should at least pay for a bit of postage?!?!! Stingey!!!
"Only passions, great passion, can elevate the soul to great things"_ Doris Diderot.
At least my calendar is mood boosting today :D
Jobs Applied For_ 1
Tears_ 1
Favourite Song Lyric_ "Sooner or later, We'll be looking back on everything, And we'll laugh about it like we knew what all was happening"
