Upon reflection, I have come to the conclusion that I am better than them.

With the father still not home from his holiday, and in desperate need of company and parental cuddles, I walked up to the mothers house.  After all, mothers are amazing!  The father is equally amazing, but in a different way... and as I said, he still hasn't returned from sunny Spain.  As I arrived mother was already busy searching the job websites for me, determined to give me a boost as quickly as possible, unfortunately the suggestion of 15 hours a week walking children to school didn't really do the trick [it sounded like a slightly overrated lollipop lady job... if I'm going to be doing silly jobs while I wait for my moment to shine then I would at least like it to be full time, and away from noisy groups of children].  I was doing well, the emotions were under control after I had decided on the walk up that I would consider phoning the doctors tomorrow [it wouldn't do me any harm would it] but after about 10 minutes they resurfaced.  I cry a lot, but very rarely in front of people [other than the poor boyfriend who gets them far too often] because I have an outer shell that guards me from public breakdowns.  But today was too much for the shell to take and tears seeped through the cracks.  Luckily mother was on hand with much needed comforting words and cuddles... although the poor brother didn't do too well from it with her saying that he was a lucky one who could fall in crap and still come up smelling of roses with the job he got [I know parents aren't meant to favour their children but everyone knows they do, and generally my brains put me ahead of the brothers in the race for number 1 child in mother's eyes].  So once again she calmed me and set me to work installing Microsoft Word so that she could write a letter to her place of work on my behalf to request feedback [she is still furious and giving dirty looks to my evil interviewer on a daily basis] and then to use her secretarial skills to help me with future cover letters.

But now I am home again, the father still hasn't returned.  But having given it thought, I am now in the angry stage of rejection, I am way better than them.  I would have loved the job, merely to say that I had a job and to feel like I am finally doing something with my life, like it finally got started... but in fairness their idea of good design was a flick in the bottom corner of the front page to make it look like the page was turned, which I personally thought was hideous [perhaps they saw the disgust in my eyes?].  I would have embraced the opportunity to work there and boost my CV but I am better than them.  They would have been lucky to have my creative skills.  Instead another company, with a much better eye for talent and design, shall enjoy my input [someday] and this one shall continue down the outdated cheap looking design road that it currently walks down.  But for now, I shall continue to shop at Spar and launch a boycott amongst my friends against the company [which I shall not name so that I don't get in to trouble].   Now that the anniversary present is complete I shall get back to work with the website, and appeal to EVERY single design company I can find.

But for now I am going to catch up on my soaps and watch my new TV addiction 'The Rachel Zoe Project'.... maybe I should just go in to fashion with all my programme addictions and love of Glamour, they are filling my brain up with more knowledge than I ever thought possible

Jobs Applied For_ 0
Tears_ 3
Note to self_ Stop being a depressive maniac and keep remembering the good things in life like the family and the boyfriend, and the few great friends who are always there